Add a Gift Message to Your Order
Awwww, isn't that sweet. You want to include a gift message with your order. Probably to tell your crush that you totally dig them or some shit. Well, you're barking up the wrong tree, asshole. The only "gift messages" I can provide will be written on a tiny cardboard penis. Yes. That's correct, motherfucker. Okay, so, if you're still reading this, here's the deal. If you want to include a "gift message" with your order...now you can! The message should be short and concise, like "Fuck Off" or "You're Not The Father" or something similar--these cardboard dicks are small and I'm not a miracle worker! So, tell someone to have a Merry Fucking Christmas, or to Fuck Off And Die--totally your choice. But whatever message you choose to include, it'll be hand written on a tiny cardboard penis!!! You're welcome.
Please include the dick message in the "notes to seller" when you check out.
OR...if you want a blank dick with no writing, just let me know.